Women’s self-defense is something I am incredibly passionate about. Did you know that 1 in 4 girls will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime? That 60% of sexual assaults are never reported to the police? That 88% of sexual assault victims knew their attacker? That 15/16 rapists will never spend a day in jail?
I am passionate about this partially because I am a sexual assault survivor. Though I sometimes still have trouble convincing myself that it wasn’t my fault, I do know that things could have been a lot worse if I didn’t have some basic self-defense skills that I learned from women’s self-defense class I took a few years ago. I actually took the class somewhat by accident, because I was naive enough to think it would never happen to me. But it did. It wasn’t rainy or night like in the movies – in fact, it was a bright, sunny afternoon. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, but I was lucky because I knew some basic moves that, also luckily, were enough to scare off my attacker.
photo via Fort Rucker
If you ever find yourself in a situation where you’re being assaulted, here are just a few things to keep in mind:
- Your knees and elbows pack the most punch in terms of force (you’re also the least likely to injure yourself if you use your elbow or knee).
- You know that self-defense bit from Miss Congeniality? It’s not bad – Solar plexus, Instep, Nose, Groin! The last two are especially good to aim for.
- Make lots of noise if you can. Yell something – anything – it will get people’s attention.
- Always be aware of your surroundings – if you’re in an unfamiliar environment, never go anywhere alone unless you’re absolutely sure it is safe (ask the locals!)
- Trust your gut. If you feel a situation is unsafe, get out. Your instinct is always your bet.
- If you are sexually assaulted, report it immediately. Even if they don’t catch your attacker, your report may help in the future if your attacker continues to attack other women.
Part of being the best woman you can be is knowing how to protect your awesome self. The effects of sexual assault can be devastating and long-lasting. You can’t know if it’ll happen to you or not – so the best thing you can do for yourself is be prepared. Don’t make the mistake I made and think it can’t happen to you. It can happen to anybody. So prepare yourself, and know how to protect yourself.
Here are some good resources:
Go forth and protect your amazing self.
EDF is what it is: a blog on how to be an Exceptionally Desirable Female (EDF), written by Exceptionally Desirable Female numero uno, Queen B (that’s me).
What does it take to be an EDF, you ask? This definition is one for the 21st century. It’s one for the go-get ’em, break boundaries (and the glass ceiling while you’re at it) ladies that this world is brimming with right at this very moment. I’m not purely talking about the JWOWWs and Anna Wintours of the world, although they make the cut. I’m talking about the JWOWWs and Anna Wintours…AND the Hillary Clintons, the Henrietta Yurchencos, the Tristan Prettymans, the Mother Teresas. The world-famous; the neighborhood famous. The loud bold; the quiet bold. The instant-domino-effect-ground-shaking fury; the silent fury. This blog will celebrate any woman who knows she’s powerful and knows how to use that power to make this world a better place for everyone around her.
There are no specific qualifications to be an EDF. There is no maximum weight or BMI, there is no beauty standard, there is no IQ standard. Whoever you are, whatever you look like, whether parts of you are plastic or inked or modified in other ways, if you consider yourself female – then you have the power to harness your inner EDF that’s waiting to come out.
Who am I? Some might say I’m under-qualified because I won’t be able to tell if your bag is worth 3 grand or if it’s a $20 rip-off from Chinatown. Others would say I’m under-qualified because I’ve had it pretty good in life. I’m white (this matters, yes, today it still matters). I come from an upper-middle class background. I went to an elite private all-women’s college in New England. Basically, I’m hot stuff. But let me tell you, that doesn’t mean I don’t know my shit. Regardless of what people could say about me, let me say that I know what I’m talking about. I know what it takes to turn anybody – and I mean anybody – into The Woman that everyone notices in the room. The one everyone wants. The one nobody argues with. The EDF.
One thing is sure: there has never been a better time to be a woman in this world. As women, we need to take advantage of the power we have as individuals and the power we have as a group to lift one another up all over the globe. This is your time. This is our time. We can make this world a better place. This blog will show you how to make it happen – how to make YOU happen. You got what it takes?