I’ll be back next week.
Time for EDF Commandment Number Two: Thou Shalt Trust Thyself
Time for a story. College, for me, was a 4-year train wreck. Every year I went back thinking it’d be an awesome year, and every year something(s) ended up happening that made it awful. Mono, swine flu, broken hearts, pets dying, relatives dying, fights, teachers ignorant of a thing called “your students have lives too, and sometimes their lives are hard” – you name it, it happened to me. My one source of relief, then and now, has been yoga.
At least four times a week I would sweat and move and flex out my problems on the mat. After a particularly rough day in the fall of my senior year, I high-tailed it to the studio as I had many times before, but I left the studio with a discovery: I didn’t trust myself.
I don’t know exactly what led to this revelation, but boy was it a revelation. It changed my life. It changed the way I saw everything around me. The next time I found myself in the middle of making a tough decision, or working through a fight, or dealing with loss, I stopped and asked myself, “What do I need right now?” And then I trusted that I knew what was best for me in that moment.
It’s important and necessary to ask for advice when you need it. Asking for advice shows you have humility; it shows you’re mature; it shows that you respect others’ opinions. But you have to remember that that’s exactly what advice is: opinions. And if someone’s advice doesn’t feel right to you, then no matter how much you respect that person, it’s probably not a good idea to follow their advice.
Simplicity is a tempting siren – it’s easy to do what we’re told. But that doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do. Trust that you have the power to make your own decisions, that your advice to yourself is good advice, that sometimes you’re the only one who knows what you need.
As one of my yoga instructors once said,
“There are no wrong decisions. There are only decisions that lead you down different paths of life. Trust that in each moment, you are exactly where you are meant to be, doing exactly what you are meant to be doing.”
We all know that women’s sports don’t get nearly enough attention from the media, or from the general public (or maybe we don’t all know, because it’s so absent from coverage that we don’t even stop to think about it). Why is this? I’m not going to try and answer that question, but it’s food for thought on this Labor Day Monday. While most of you probably aren’t working, I thought Labor Day’s Power Monday would be the perfect opportunity to celebrate an EDF that just doesn’t stop working. She’s like the Energizer bunny, maybe mixed with a rock ’em-sock ’em. Pat Summitt is the head coach of University of Tennessee’s women’s basketball team, and she is this week’s Power Monday EDF.
Why she kicks butt: Coach Summitt has been the head of the Lady Vol basketball team for 37 years. That’s dedication, folks. And she rocks at what she does: she has the most wins of any coach ever of any men’s or women’s NCAA basketball team in any division. WOAH. The current numbers are 1,037 wins to 196 losses, 8 of those being NCAA Championships. The former number is sure to rise as she continues coaching this season, despite being diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s Disease this year. She’s known as quite the toughie, and according to the Washington Post she nearly knocked out the doctor who told her about her condition, saying, “Do you have any idea who you’re dealing with?”
10 things you might not know (source, except where noted otherwise):
“To get through the hardest journey we need take only one step at a time, but we must keep on stepping.”
Photo by saraemcc
Things in my mind’s eye this week:
I particularly like the Adventurer Satchel. Now excuse me while I hold up a bank so I can afford to buy it.
2) Thingiverse: a website for artists, designers, and engineers to share their ideas and designs, with Creative Commons or General Public Use licenses. Because who doesn’t want to build their own turtle shell racers?
3) Notes from the Road. This blog is Erik Gauger’s travel photography blog. If you need to escape for a second and remind yourself that there are beautiful things in the world, this is the place to do it.
4) Peugot’s RCZ Asphalt Edition. Oh-so-sexy. The perfect EDF car. Excuse me while I go hold up another bank.
A girl’s gotta dream big.
In case you haven’t clicked around enough on this site yet, the “Do You Have What It Takes?” link in the sidebar takes you to the first ten rules of being an Exceptionally Desirable Female. I’ll be adding more rules to this list as time goes on, but these first 10 aren’t called the Ten Commandments for nothin’. They are the most important things to keep in mind in your inner journey for EDF status.
The very first commandment? Thou shalt be beautiful.
What does this mean? This means, first and foremost, you know what beauty is. And to know what beauty is, you have to know what beauty is not. Beauty is not bought, it is not sold, it does not come wrapped in plastic and it is not one-size-fits-all. It is not poverty, it is not abuse, it is not mistrust.
Beauty is: you.
Yes, you. Cliche, perhaps, but understanding this above all else is so important to unleashing all the power that is within yourself, I cannot possibly stress it enough. You are beautiful, already, as you are. Could you be a better person? Of course. So could I, so could everybody. Should you take steps to be a better person? Absolutely. That’s what being an EDF is all about. But honey, before you can do anything else, you have to be able to tell yourself with absolutely conviction that you are beautiful.
In today’s Western society, we’re not good with taking compliments and we’re not good with being good to ourselves. Queen B though I may be, even I have moments where I don’t think I’m a beautiful person. That is so not true. That is not true for anybody.
So, go practice. That’s right. Go find a mirror. You there? Good. Now look yourself in the eyes. Look! Look how beautiful your eyes are. They are, as they say, windows to the soul. So take a look, and then repeat after me:
I am beautiful.
What’s that? I can’t hear you.
I am beautiful!
Third time’s a charm.
I am BEAUTIFUL!
Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder, y’all. Once you’ve convinced yourself that you’re beautiful, no one can tell you otherwise.
Now go strut your stuff, you beauty queen.